Advice to
the young men in my life.
The other day I became inspired to restart my blog, but in a slightly
different direction than previous topics.
I’ve been listening to podcasts from The Art of Manliness. As I listened to Walker Lamond talk about his
book “Advice to My Unborn Son” I began
thinking about the young men in my life.
I am blessed with a wonderful daughter and was able to teach her many
things as she grew up. Now I have a one
year old grandson and I began thinking about what advice/wisdom I would give to
him to help make him into a man. I also
began thinking of the two young men in my life – my son-in-law, and my “adopted”
son. What advice would I give to them,
even though they are adults now?
So, I sat down at my desk and let the ideas flow in no particular
order. I was able to come up with about
50 different ideas. Are these “for men
only”? Of course not. Many of these I hope I have instilled in my
daughter. But I do believe that there
are differences between men and women, and some things that make a man a
man. My (ambitious) goal is to try to
write about one of these things each week.
My influences of manhood are varied.
First and foremost is my father.
I learned many things from him (which I will reference in posts to
come). My grandfather was a quiet man,
but I learned a lot watching him. I also
learned a lot from my Scoutmaster. Biographies
of soldiers, sailors and marines from WWII provided much inspiration. Fictional role models for me were John Wayne,
Louis L’Amour protagonists, and Captain America and Superman.
So, let’s begin. I said that I let
the ideas flow in no particular order.
That isn’t true for the first one, for I believe it is the foundation
for everything else:
First,
Jesus.
I make no bones about the fact that I am a Christian (I am a priest in
the Anglican Church of America, after all!) and I believe that trusting in
Jesus as your savior and your Lord is paramount. The Bible tells us that God created man and
desires to be in relationship with him. God
also desires that man be in relationship with creation – the world, animals,
plants, other human beings. Jesus allows
us to be in relationship with God. Jesus also shows us through His life what
the perfect man (or woman) is.
I think people often tend to think of Jesus as a wimp. Yes, this is the guy who said “turn the other
cheek”. He’s also the guy that made a
whip out of cords and drove people out of the temple. Jesus faced torture and crucifixion. He slept through stormy seas that made
seasoned fisherman afraid for their lives.
When it comes to strength and courage and fitness, Jesus was a man’s
man.
Jesus was a leader. He was able to
keep a diverse group of followers (coming from all walks of life, all levels of
education, and all professions) focused on the objective, even when they didn’t
fully understand what that was. He was a
servant leader – washing the feet of his disciples like the lowliest of
servants. He had such charisma that
people literally dropped everything to follow him. (You may think that is an exaggeration, but I
had the privilege of meeting a man once that – had he said “come with me”, I
would have followed anywhere. His name
is Archbishop Benjamin Kwashi).
Jesus wasn’t afraid to show emotion – He cried and He rejoiced. He had compassion on those around him. He became indignant at injustice and
hypocrisy. He demonstrated extravagant
love – sacrificial love.
As a man, we should try to live our lives in the example that Jesus
gave. We should also be submitted to
him, as he was submitted to the authority of God the Father. This means having a spiritual life (also more
to come on this) that includes being an active member of a church, regular
prayer, and service, and following His commandments.
As a man makes Jesus first in his life, and establishes Him and His
teachings as a foundation, everything else comes from, and is built upon, that
foundation.
Next time: Being a gentleman.
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